New Life - and healthy chocolate cookies

I have always seen myself as having a black thumb - we automatically purchased almost everything for our garden this year certain that I would be unable to start anything successfully from seed. Yet...

this morning I baffled all three of my men by being utterly awed by this...

I sat, and stared, and sat and stared...

I have made our proud announcement to all who walk by... our sunflowers came through! What magic! The mammoth with its seed so large and its leaves pushing, pushing, to break free. The evening sun with its ruby toned stalk proudly pressing upward. What a miracle. Never before.

Well everyday most places, but never before here. And our strawberries are THRIVING!

And all the tiny seedlings in the background? Pretty sure they are the poppies and wildflowers we also were sure hadn't made it.

Enthralled I rushed over to our community garden and peeked... sure enough! There too my sunflowers had finally come through! I had given up completely! And what's more, my radishes that I planted on Saturday are already through and thick! And somehow the zinnias that I accidentally planted weeks ago where the radishes were meant to be and that I had presumed dead, popped through too. We'll see how they co-habitate!

PS I have been delighting in making cookies from Veganomicon and adapted this one enough that I thought I could share it without it being stealing. ENJOY!

PB and J Chocolate Cookies

1/2 cup strawberry preserves
1 c honey
1/4 cup fresh or frozen raspberries
1/3 cup canola oil
1 t vanilla
1 t almond extract
1/2 c plus a little unsweetened cocoa
1 1/2 c. whole wheat flour
3/4 t baking soda
1/2 himalayan rock salt (just what i had!)
1/3 c natural peanut butter

Preheat oven to 350

Mix wet ingredients and dry separately then add dry to wet in three batches.
By last batch it will be workable like play dough and you can add your pb in however you desire (or save it to make sandwiches with the warm cookies! yummmm)

Roll dough into walnut sized balls and smush then pop on the sheet (they dont spread) in the oven for 10 min, cool for 10 more, and ENJOY!!

(I had kids running over on the playground to beg for these, so make lots.)

PPS Thanks for all of the prayers and advice for Rowan. His rash seems much better today. His first request upon waking was to head to the park. He even pulled on his shoes over his jammies!

A Spring Update and Erythema Multiforme with vasculitis

It's been a long time since i've sat down and written. The sunshine was inviting and more recently i've been nursing a sick little boy back to health. But before I share about that I want to catch you up on the Cramer family spring... (this is going to be a long one)

We prepared for Easter with a candle ceremony...

Delighted in home grown wheat grass, husband harvested forsythia, Easter dinner with friends, and  baskets full of thrifted books, natural art supplies, felted and wooden eggs, new cups and mugs, and even some organic candies...

We are still enjoying our wagon and walking copiously in our lovely Princeton spring...

hosting family on four different occasions and having a blast showing off Ben's campus...

playing (and nursing) in our amazing university library...

practicing a bit of yoga...

doing some home improvement projects...

exploring some local historic spots...

 loving watching our garden grow.
Strawberries, leeks, spinach, and arugula, radishes, carrots, chamomile, calendula, zinnias, and sunflowers, romaine, tomatoes, rhubarb, and basil, cilantro, dill, snap peas and onions... so much coming to life.

 Cedar is willing to try anything these days from riding his brothers old tricycle to mowing the lawn.
His especial new favorite is eating dandelions. Thank goodness our lawns are not treated here. Look how happy it makes him! The nurture of all this will hold off my baby cravings this summer as my 10 month old toddles all around me, NOT wanting a hand to hold, NOT needing his mama, (unless of course he starts craving yet another mommy milkshake.)

And we have loved relaxing and reading in this hammock my sweet husband bought for me to prevent me from moving our bed onto the porch when the weather got nice...

My three year old came down with a mysterious and terrible case of hives that was diagnosed as erythema multiforme with vasculitis. I have been further encouraged in my pursuit of a nursing degree through this experience as I have been dissatisfied with my doctors ability to communicate. She spoke quickly using unfamiliar technical terms, diagnosing without listening, not inviting questions, tossing a prescription at me and commanding me not to research his condition as it would only make me worry unduly! 

I would have loved for her to sit down calmly and ask me what we had experienced, what i thought might be going on, examined him, giving me her theories and the reasons for them and descriptions of them, and a variety of treatment options. I would have loved for her to at least try to help me figure out what had triggered the outbreak. I know that she went to medical school and I haven't so she might not feel it time efficient to listen to me but...ugh. My recent pediatric experiences have left me with a terrible taste in my mouth. (My last ped. wouldn't allow us to stay with the practice if we didn't immunize). 

I can't even imagine what it's like to be the parent of a child suffering with worse. I have new compassion.

Has anyone encountered this condition before that could share some knowledge with me? It is difficult to have a feverish little guy shouting at you bc his purple and gray, hivey, legs are so tender he doesn't want to walk on them or be touched. There are only a few square inches on his body that are rash free. I was given a prescription antihistamine and a push out the door informing me that he would start looking and feeing better in a week or two. That is a LONG time to be covered in welts uninformed.

To those who are still with me... thanks :)

Journey On

Crisp air, sunshine flowing, soul finally finally relaxing. The past few days I have found my fuse short, and have oscillated between feeling ashamed and self righteous; neither state of mind healthy for long.

But now, deep breath, after deep breath, baby snores the only sound accompanying the tapping of my keys... I feel it, the calm i've been seeking is arriving.

The knowledge that I just finished editing my husband's 34 page paper for his independent study on Clairvaux. The knowledge that my chemistry class is wrapping up and that I did well. The knowledge that the round faced one's teeth are through and we are experiencing some respite. The knowledge that my little boy will be a little boy will be a little boy, and I just need to love him.

I feel like I have a bit more of a handle on life than I had. I've written out a very loose day to day plan to start teaching lil guy the basics of letters and phonetics, and counting and art, and ecology and music and geography... We've decided to put our boy on a movie fast for a month, and that just not being an option has been refreshing... heartening to watch his creativity and industry within play develop.

Plus one of the biggest delights has been the awareness that we are coming into my favorite camping season. Climbing gear has been purchased for the whole family, gear racks acquired for the top of the car, and it is time to play. to explore. to spend evenings around fire pits. to snuggle into our new hammock and learn about the stars.

Hope and anticipation prevail as I allow this new season to surround me and entice me onward.

              
                                                  Thanks for joining me as I journey on.

Hobbit Footin'

Recently Rowan and I have been "hobbit footin' ". This is what my sweet three year old calls going barefoot. My dad just sent us a copy of Born to Run and my husband and I devoured it. It teaches about all sorts of aspects of running and inspired me to give running a chance sans shoes. I ditched them and have been surprised how much I like feeling the ground beneath my feet as I move. What used to be a chore for me has turned into play time. Supposedly this mode of movement is not only fun but is also how we were made to get around. We weren't created with cars or skateboards or shoes for that matter... just highly intricately designed feet. Therefore it is supposed to allow us to self correct our posture and stride - the sensations through our feet teach us what is proper and keep us from injury.

Meg at Sew Liberated wrote a great post about it here that I highly recommend. She also has great pictures of the 50 mile race described in the book.

Worms, Strawberries, and Sunshine

Today was an utter delight -

much awaited -

our first community garden work day. We tilled compost into all the soil, marked out the beds, and had a worm box composting tutorial. (yea!!) SO, now I am sitting at home guiltily enjoying the feeling of a bit too much sun on my cheeks, with a transplanted second year strawberry bush (big score! left behind from last year), and a big box full of worms and compost. Pretty dang educational. I have a big smile on my face and a big question mark in my head as I try to decide what to plant in that luscious and inviting space. EXCITING!!

Outdoor adventures

Warm weather camping season is upon us again and a group of our friends will head out next weekend to just all pop tent, sit around a fire, hike around, enjoy life together. This will be our first group camping experience with kids - any suggestions?

This picture was taken last time we camped with friends + kid. Now that little roley poley is a long and lean three 1/2 year old and we have a new roley poley to bring. We are thinking of getting an ENO double nesting hammock for Ben, so that he doesn't have to make that face again, the "this chunk kept me up all night ... I remember when I got to be man vs wild and ENJOY camping" face.

Again, we would love any family camping advice. Happy spring!

April Update

Quick Update:

This month's plastic fast helped me to become much more mindful of what I use and purchase. I was no purist -sometimes I was outright rebellious, but I definitely eliminated heavily packaged items from my grocery list - started using cloth produce bags, and only regularly cheated with thinly wrapped cheeses.

We've continued our commitment to make our own hair products, extended our cloth diapering to include wipes too, and I am still a vegetarian.

For April I commit to no longer driving to the grocery store - its way too close to drive esp now that the weather is so beautiful.

I have loved these challenges. Each one has served as a regular reminder of the simple and rich life I want to live - constantly drawing me back to my ideals to live gratefully and respectfully for this gift of life God has given me.